Thank you, Panera
This past week, I was hanging out in Princeton every day because I had to drop off and pick up my son at computer camp and it simply wasn’t worth the time to drive home or into the city. So I made Panera my office. God bless them, they provide free wi-fi, which is a great gift to the officeless, and have great scones and damned fine salads and sandwiches. Their rules are quite simple: If you’re there in the lunch rush, please don’t stay more than 30 minutes and if you’re alone, please don’t set up shop at a table for six. Otherwise, they just leave you alone. I’m grateful and so I wanted to thank Panera and give them this plug.
But working there for a week gives you another bonus: theater.
One day, I sit next to and cannot help eavesdropping on a guy who reminded me Dwight on The Office performing a job interview for some post in a web development shop. The guy was insufferable: pompous, pedantic, boring. He went on and on about how he had a brilliant concept for a site for an attorney (I’ll change the name to protect the humiliated): “Norbert Schmertz: Superlawyer!” He gave a lecture to the prospect about intellectual property by reading two pages of a memo, slowly. He droned on and on. I looked at the poor shnook across the table from the dweeb and wanted to walk over and say, “No, don’t do it, don’t take this job. You’ll live to regret it. They’re hiring at Panera. It’s much nicer. Save yourself before it’s too late.” But working in Panera is beaming onto a plent from the Enterprise: You don’t interfere.
I heard lots of job interviews and meetings between bosses and subordinates going over sales figures and assignments. This restaurant rents out rooms in the back for business meetings (’hey, gang, we’re having our first offsite — at Panera’) and one day, I saw three geeky guys prepare the room for an hour, setting up their computers in a row and then in a taping paper over all the windows — never writing a word on any of it — apparently so we couldn’t steal their corporate secrets. Could be the next Google.
Most people kept their heads down into their laptops. The wise ones also wore headsets and I soon learned why. Some people who come into Panera, it seems, are lonely. One morning as I was rushing to get work done before my meter run out of the considerable change Princeton demands (and tickets are $60), a nice guy — an investor, he said — just wanted to chat. I tried to listen politely and give the cue that I needed to get work done, glancing back at my laptop again and again. He didn’t get the cue. Neither did the woman who came into the back one afternoon shouting into her cell phone to close bank accounts and cancel credit cards. Turns out she was getting divorced. Whenever she was put on hold, which was often, she would start telling me her life’s story, as much as I really didn’t want to know it, all about her therapy and her divorce and her self-image. Outside, I was nodding politely and trying to get my head back into my laptop. Inside, I was screaming, ‘Arrrrrggggghh!’ The woman could not let five second go by without filling the room with talk. Hate to say it, but inside I was also thinking that the divorce was not a huge surprise.
Now I’m sitting at home in my quiet office staring at the woods and I have to say, I kind of miss the show. Thanks, Panera.
Tags: Life
August 5th, 2006 at 5:48 pm
I’m sure you know this, but Micawber, next to Panera, is a place where one can just spend days transfixed by books. I love their used book section.
And yeah, it is fun to people watch in Panera. Usually, when I was there, I would see parents and grandparents talk about which amazing college their kid was going to.
I’m getting hungry. I love that bread and those soups.
August 5th, 2006 at 7:51 pm
I have not foriven Panera for removing their cheese danishes (at least in NW Indiana). Although, my blood sugars are a lot lower so maybe I should thank them for making just about the worst muffin on earth.
Richard Russo, the novelist who wrote ‘Empire Falls,’ usually writes in cafes and places like Panera. I don’t know how he does it without headphones, but judging from his work, it works well.
August 5th, 2006 at 8:38 pm
I had a similar challenge a month ago. My 8 year old was at horseback riding camp and I too needed a temp wi-fi office.
But I lfound a McDonalds, my former place of employment some 35 years ago, and spent a day watching the passing parade of humanity and sipping ice coffee. My table even had an outlet next to it and I spoke to three Mexican workers off and on all day about our hopes for a Mexican victory at the World Cup. Not to be.
You see, my upscale hometown has a Panera. Been there. Great cheese rolls. But the people are all ltoo much like me — arrogant, pretentious prissy bastards who all speak in a conspicuously loud voice to their little “shit doens’t stink” kids so everyone else in the room will know they are enlightened parents.
“Yes, Billy, today after swimming camp ends you are starting foreign policy camp at Brookings. And then there is epidemiology camp at Walter Reed. No 5th grader is going to be better prepared for an international pandemic of influenza. ”
I want my Big Mac.
a
August 6th, 2006 at 7:17 am
Jeff,
Next time you’re in Princeton (I live here), give me a shout… java’s on me.
August 6th, 2006 at 12:22 pm
You might tell your new web developer friend that Superlawyers is already taken by an advertorial-pushing publisher.
August 6th, 2006 at 1:27 pm
A follow-up… In case Panera is paying attention, their muffins stink because they over-mix the batter. Think Raymond Carver, Panera–Less is more.
August 6th, 2006 at 5:22 pm
Jeff,
I hate you. You made my mouth water. I could see Panera so clearly, with all the goings on you spoke of . I could even smell the coffee and the scones. The problem is-I have no way of going being several thousands of miles from the nearest one here in Taiwan.
We have Starbucks out the yin-yang, but the bloom is long off of that rose. Will just have to wait until my next trip back to the States. Unfortunately, “knowledge” tells me none in Phoenix. Guess, I’ll have to live vicariously through you a while longer.
August 12th, 2006 at 2:20 pm
Hey, jeff i happen to work in Panera down here in orlando and it was cool to hear that u appreciate panera so much. Ive written many a essay sitting in my own booth listening to music. Working there is great experience and it is like a family sometimes. I hope Panera can continue to be a place of not only work, but relaxation and great food!!!!
November 9th, 2007 at 11:54 pm
I work at Panera. I like the food and all of the breads we serve. I am not going to lose any weight if I keep eating there. Yummm !!!!!!!